seconds, i’ve never felt so alive

What a day, after explaining to my English teacher that I had an appointment with the doctor at 12.15 (I did have one, at 3.50) I was granted permission to leave class early, which was a shame in the end as pleasantville turned out to be an interesting film.

With the spring in my step bent sideways I headed down to the local aquatic center, after a short conversation with the guy at the counter (‘can I go for a swim?’ ‘yeah, $5′ ‘cool, which way’s the pool?’) I followed him out to the changeroom where I got undressed while he fixed a shower faucet and pretended he wasn’t watching.

sup lungs?

sup lungs?

After exiting the changerooms and being behold with the sight you see above (pool to myself, fuck yeah), my lungs began clawing at the inside of my rib cage in a vain attempt to go somewhere nice for the winter, I however, would have none of their shenanigans. Proceeding to step into the pool, I then began the most intensive bout of physical exercise I think I’ve done since year 7 sex ed (awww yeah).

Well fuck, after 45 minutes, like 25 laps and feeling the urge to vomit or drown too many times, I stepped out of the pool with biceps the size of something that resembles a healthy arm, and pecs that bounced to my steps. Unfortunately, my new foundĀ  body of someone my age only lasted 15 minutes (which were well spent staring at myself in the changeroom mirror) as the blood subsided not long after (fingers crossed it becomes permanent soon enough).

Harnessing the momentum from what medical experts will later describe as “my polio patient trying to swim” I set of on a journey to my towns less conventional residential areas to kill time before visiting a real life medical expert. Some of the houses I found near each other where just plain stupid.

this

this

next to this

next to this

I’d say there was once a house on that puddle.

and this around the corner...?

and this around the corner...?

The phallic plants in their yard moved with the wind in accordance to the human anatomy after which they were designed.

Shortly after that photo was taken it began to piss pour down with rain; it was still 2 hours before I was needed at the doctor’s so I began seeking some shelter. After around 10 minutes of braving the cold and pretending I hadn’t seen old ladies knocked off their merry ways by the wind, I came to our local christian church. Now I’m no believer, but some of the things that churches do are pretty cool, for example while I was sitting there listening to isolation (on my trusty, albeit ill-gotten iPod) and feeling sorry for old men taking their afternoon walk in the shit weather, it dawned on me that I’d never seen a church without a large alcove at the front to protect people from the elements.

have you ever felt so desperate?

have you ever felt so desperate?

By the time the rain stopped it was time to head to the clinic where I found out how to quit smoking, (fuck yeah) and some other things to fix involving my unicorn’s mastitis and stuff.

I also like this photo.

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